Today is my birthday and I find myself replaying the day my mom died. Not what I expected to wake up to today but okay, here I am. Good morning grief, you sure are a sneaky little bugger.
She and dad would call me on my birthday and mom would tell the story about the day I was born. Mom had been in a head on car collision when she was pregnant with me and when I was delivered (naturally), both her legs were in casts, one up to her thigh, the other up to her knee. One can imagine how my birth went. Dad being no help until one of the nurses yelled at him to hold one of mom's casted legs is my favorite part of the story. Then they would sing happy birthday to me and tell me how proud they were of me and how much they loved me.
I have to remind myself those phone calls stopped a few years ago. There is a bittersweetness as most memories that come to mind skip the most recent years and hang out in the joyful years. The years where I would wake up and my dad would stand at the foot of the stairs singing, "Here she is, Miss America" as I descended said stairs. The years of watching them become grandparents. The years of grabbing friends or family and driving through the night to show up at mom and dad's place in Florida to soak up some sunshine, get rest and play card games.
And it's all over now. Again I have to remind myself of the most recent years. They were tired and fading and ready to leave this world. God answered their prayers and took them home. It is a good thing, right?
I know it is, but good things hurt.
4 comments:
Oh… so precious, Suzanne❣️I see the fruit of your parent’s love in your sweet, authentic spirit… love you💕
Beautiful 💛 And so hard. Yes, good but still so hard 😞
Sweet memory to share. I needed to read this today! Thank you Suzanne and Happy Birthday! Thank you for remembering your mom on your day of birth into this world 🌎 ❤
First is HAPPY BIRTHDAY, and I tell you I have so many dreams of us. I think it's because I never had closing with them when they left this old world. I use to dream of my home place where I was raised all the time. One day Angie, Sheri and I stopped by there, and Nancy told me to just go anywhere and look. We did and you know I never have dreamed about my home place again. I miss ALL OF YOU. LOVE YOU🌹
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