confessions to denial of death

the denial of death is a book. i hear its a good book...but i've never read it. so yes...in my previous blog entry i referenced a book i've never read. i, suzanne price, tried to sound smarter than i really am. BUT in my defense, my husband did read it and told me all about it. so why should i bother thinking when he can do all the thinking and then tell me about it?

some women get so bent out of shape about other women needing to think on their own, make independent decisions, challenge themselves. blah, blah, blah.

just do what i did. marry smart. then you never have to think again.

its quite freeing. you don't believe me? then you've never tried it. :)

Jaden is coming home right now. he had just started a nap at the sitters when i left work, so i let him sleep. the sitter is dropping him off at the house because she has an errand to run close to the house. seriously...everybody should get a trisha. i'm so excited to see jaden. everybody should get a jaden too.

i'm wearing a pretty skirt from india. my boss' wife bought it for me. everytime i think i don't like my job, i think about all the pretty stuff she buys me and i feel lots better. ahhh...the denial of death.

right now...i should be working

you know what i'm doing instead? i read an entire entertainment weekly...bonus edition. i've never done that before and by the the gloss in my eyes and the sense that my brain has officially morphed itself into goo...i won't do it again. but ask me anything irrelevant about the entertainment world in the next day (the longest i will retain it) and i'll be happy to fill you in. what i gained. i learned that Arrested Developement will be on fox starting today until july 9th. and for that...it was worth it.

my friend is leaving

i don't like it when my friends leave. she got a job...stupid jerk job that takes people away. its actually a great job for her. i just hate it for taking her away.

i'm sad, and i stubbed my toe.

wwf wrestler in training

okay...so i know its no longer WWF wrestling...because i remember the commercial that says, "its time to get the "f" out." i just can't remember the what letter replaced it. so i hope you all know what i'm talking about...and if you don't congratulations on being cooler than everyone else who does know.

this is alluding to our play date yesterday. it didn't go so well. it started great, but once a toy was taken from jaden...there was hell to pay. grace (the girl he was playing with) was delightful. jaden, not so much. in his defense he was exhausted and was coming down with a cold (which i didn't know at the time). but wow, he actually head butted me when i was trying to calm him down. he needs a stage name, like "the caveman" or "bam bam the great." his major move is a head butt. he can also spit (but it comes out like drool) and pass toxic fumes (known as poop).

any ideas on names?

a new first

i think i had my first migrane yesterday. it was either that or i ate something very bad, but the symptoms were much more in line with migrane. that was a good time.

i'm not a good salesperson. i never have been. i always lost the fundraising campaigns in elementary school. it makes me so uncomfortable asking someone to take something they didn't ask for. i don't think sales are bad, i'm just bad at it. i'm finding that even with the shop, i'm having a hard time selling it to people. i feel like if its good, it will sell itself...but i know thats not true. people have to come in the door for it to sell itself. business is slow. i'm getting lots of paperwork done at the shop, but its still boring for the other workers.

jaden and i are going for a play date today. i'm so excited. its like i'm a real mom or something. i don't even know if he technically plays with other kids, but we will see.

i just got my magazine in the mail that makes me feel like i need to change everything in my life. i'll let you know what big changes i feel that i need to make...that i probably won't make. but i'm sure you'll all be glad to know that i went shopping and bought lots of fruits a veggies. i'll let you know if i eat any of them.

jaden just shut himself in his room and is crying. mom duty calls.

wonderwoman?...yeah...i like the sound of that

catering is done for the time being...yea!!!
my last job, i got applause every time i had to leave my station and talk to the host. i'm not talking a smattering of applause...i'm talking full blown-one step away from standing ovation-applause.

how does one respond to that? "yes, yes...i do make crepes worthy of your praise. thank you for recognizing how talented and beautiful i am."

strange...but i guess it was nice in a too much clapping surreal way.

i'm having a hard time appreciating my days. i'm very blessed and yet i struggle to see it. i know God wants so much more for me, and yet it feels like i'm going through life with blinders. i want God to swoop down, whip off the blinders, and reveal to me all that i'm missing in life.

thats all for now, feel free to applaud my openess.

water+dirt=

today i...
-worked in the morning
-picked up lunch for dan and i
-came home and fed jaden
-ate my lunch while dan went to the store
-laid down for a few minutes
-went outside with dan and jaden and played in the new kiddie pool dan bought at the store
-watered the flowers (and my car unitentionally)
-weeded a couple of flower gardens
-sprayed jaden with the hose
-came inside and took a shower
-put jaden down for a nap
-sat down and watched a tlc trading spaces rerun
-got jaden up from his nap
-ordered pizza
-went shopping for a few groceries with nicole and jaden
-picked up pizza
-came home and fed jaden dinner
-hung out with my fried kelly (who came over)
-cleaned the kitchen
-watched as all dan's poker buddies came over to play in our basement
-hung out with kelly more/played with jaden
-hung out with nicole when she got back home/played with jaden
-gave jaden a bath
-made a bottle for jaden and had him put to bed
-hung out with nicole more
-said goodnight to all of dan's poker buddies
-sat down at the computer to blog
-fell asleep typing

jared wasn't there...obviously...he would never stand for that

i took a walk with jaden today. we went on a lunch date to subway. the walk was great...subway was not. i work in a restuarant, so i like to think that i give grace to fast food workers...and for the record, i was nice. on the outside. i was not feeling nice on the inside. i walked into the subway and there were only two people in line...i state again...only two people. the girl working behind the counter looked at me, and yelled,"some help please!" she threw my 2 orders down and continued yelling for more help...even though there wasn't anyone in line behind me. could my two orders be that strenuous? maybe the baby was throwing her off. i ordered a 6 in roast beef (for me), and a 6 inch veggie patty (for jaden). she threw the veggie patty in the microwave, and then i did the unimaginable...i asked her to toast my sandwich. she looked at me and said (imagine a snotty tone)"is that what you wanted for the veggie patty too?" um...no. through all of this no one has come to help her...which she wasn't too happy about. maybe they noticed there was nothing else to do. God forbid anyone that works for me ever act that way.

i'm over it...and i'm over subway.

just call me mrs. ooh la la

i'm catering. i know...quite a thrilling intro. its a good money maker, but it takes a lot out of me. i have one more job next sat. and the i should be done for awhile. i'm taking it easy tomorrow, and mostly working from home...which i've started cleaning finally. my coffee table is shiny, and my floors are shiny. i managed to move some crap from my kitchen into my basement. my crap is still in the house...but not as visible.
wow my life is exciting. i have a garden to weed...would you like to know about that?

dan has me watching this god awful show called "next." i still don't get the whole concept, but it looks like the concept is 5 girls or 5 boys try to avoid getting "nexted" by the object of desire (a 20 something ken or barbie). the longer they can go without getting passed on, the more money they make. the goal is to get asked out on another date. there is something severely wrong with this system...and yet i watch...and want dan to turn the station back so i know who won. i think that means something is wrong with me.

i want to change all my household products to non toxic. i think that will solve all the problems we have with sickness. at least thats what my magazine tells me. its worth a shot. i'll let you know how it works.

a thought...for household products to be harmful, don't they have to be used? somehow i think my household sicknesses will continue.